Red Meat Isn't Good For You Anyway

Hamburgers, a photo by m.mate on Flickr.

So, I have been obsessing over this whole "cooking from scratch" pledge I've declared and I have to say so far, not so good.

I made up my mind that Sunday was going to be the day I tackled my red meat issues. But after waking up at 3:30am to report to work at 5am on Saturday morning then deciding to go get "loose with some Grey Goose" Saturday night AND clocking in a few more hours Sunday at the J-O-B, it didn't seem so appealing.

Not wanting to let my "dog" tiredness be an excuse, I decided to forgo the Burger King drive-thru and make some homemade hamburgers.

OK, first of all, I've done this before. I don't know if I have selective amnesia or what, but apparently somewhere between me forming patties, placing them on the George Foreman and putting the burgers together something went wrong.

My children took one bite of their burgers, politely placed them back on their plates and unapologetically told me they were nasty. Needless to say, dinner ended up being a mix between hot dogs and ham sandwiches.

I am thinking if I can't get a burger right, then what chance do I have of cooking a juicy steak? I see "veganism" in our future.

Facing Reality

dreams and wishes. 62/365, a photo by nicole.pierce.photography ♥ on Flickr.

Last night as I was trying to find everything under the moon to do in order to avoid doing the inevitable, homework, I started to ask myself a very important question. (I talk to myself quite often, you see, because I always say what I want to hear.) What do I really want to do with the rest of my life?

At my age (whatever you guess is right, but I'm sure I posted it on here somewhere before) you think I would have this figured out. You want to know why I don't? Because I wanted to do everything at one time or another. I have pursued every career known to man at.  I have enrolled in every type of school from court reporting to film/movie classes (actually completed a "production assistant" course where I later found myself as a errand running/script copying girl..sorry I quit that one) And don't get me started on the amount of times I have enrolled in 4-year universities and community colleges.

Call it a midlife crisis or feeling like I'm stuck in a rut, but I decided to take some time this weekend and evaluate my current dreams and goals. How realistic are they? Is there really a job out there that will pay me to sit under a big palm tree while reading my favorite books and sipping on mojitos?

I think we all may feel like this at one time in our life or maybe you have your dream career, but it doesn't hurt to re-evaluate every now and again. I think it's never to late to start over or re-invent yourself, just have to put your (my) mind to it.

Channeling My Goddess of Domestication

Fresh from the Oven, a photo by Meadaura on Flickr.

(Disclaimer: I have been watching way too many cooking shows..so this came about.)

My life is basically drama free. I have no serious worries except for the general issues like the next election, will Olivia and Harry Connick Jr's character on Law and Order SVU hit it off and my demise while still being labled as "never married." Besides those things, nothing else.

With that being said; when there's nothing to worry about, I worry that there is something I should be worrying about. So tapping the craziness within, I find something. What has me in a tizzy these days? Cooking for my grandchildren.

Now my sons are only 10 and 15, mind you, but I'm worried that when they go off and find some hussy to marry, that I won't be the grandparent to host the fabulous holiday dinner that most grandma's are known for. They will never call me to bake a cake from scratch because they are the bomb-diggity. My grandchildren will look at me with sadness as they cry out "chicken nuggets again, granny?!" I was never that mother who cooked fabulous meals or baked cakes and pies from scratch. It's time for that to change.

So, I figure I have a good 15 or so years (hopefully longer) before the kids start producing kids and this will give me time to learn and burn. I am going to make every attempt to cook and bake from scratch from now on.

Week one: (which will start Sunday, because much like the diet I have been on for the past 15 years, it doesn't make sense to start in the middle of the week)

Tackling my fear of cooking red meat.

I will keep you posted.

Wordless Wednesday

African American Family, a photo by Black History Album on Flickr.

The only happy vintage family photo (not mine) that I could find. They didn't smile much back in the day.

Grass Stains and Holey Jeans Are Da Bomb

While performing one of the many menial tasks that help define my whole being, laundry, I ran across something I haven't seen in a long while. A big ole grass stain and small hole on my 10-year old's jeans. Holl-a-lu-yer!

I am not ashamed to say that everyone in my entire household (three people) are slaves to electronic devices.  Between the three gaming consoles, XBox live parties and PC gaming, my boys are glued to one spot most of the day.  Oh, I cannot exclude myself at all. I'm totally attached to my laptop due to Facebooking, Twittin', Tumblring and my two newest addictions, Pinterest and Netflix.

Now, I'm not saying that we never leave the house; but oftentimes, when we do get out to interact with the outside world, the littlest one reminds me that he has a party to go to and his friends will be waiting. Not live, in the flesh kids, but his friends in London, Boston and  Austin.  So imagine my excitement when I found evidence that my child actually went out into the daylight and got his physical activity on.

With this little eye-opening discovery, I've decided to add another item to my 2012 "To Do" list, find an outdoor family activity every week (weather permitting). I'm sure my 15-year old will jump with delight at this one.  Well, he loves to hang out with us of course.

(His reaction... poor thang)

Hold On To Some of That Enthusiasm For These Too...

Unless you were living in a cave during this past week, than I'm sure you've heard that this was the film Red Tails opening weekend.  I really appreciate George Lucas' work.  If it wasn't for him there wouldn't be a Star Wars.  If it wasn't for Star Wars, then the guys behind Family Guy would not have written the best parody ever. (Which is quoted often in my little household. "Something, Something, Something...darkside.")

But I digress.

Now that everyone is "going on and on" like George Lucas remade the six part epic mini-series which was Roots, I just hope we can show that same excitement when these smaller budget films about black folks have their time to shine.

Let me hip you some films being showcased at the 2012 Sundance Festival this week.

First on deck, Red Hook Summer by film vet Spike Lee

Movie Site

The basics: It's about a young man who leaves Atlanta to spend the summer with his preaching, "save your soul" grandfather in Brooklyn U.S.A.

Reasons to check it out: Clarke Peters, you know the guy who played Lester in The Wire and Big Chief Albert Lambreaux in Treme, is the grandfather. Plus, Spike Lee is bringing Mookie from Do The Right Thing back.


Next up, LUV by new filmmaker Sheldon Candis. Here's a scene from the movie, check it out.



The basics: It's about the relationship between an 11-year old boy and his uncle played by Common.

Reasons to run to the theater to see it: It's about the relationship between an 11-year old boy and his uncle played by Common! Plus, let's hope we get a chance to show this up and coming filmmaker some love.


And last (for today that is) on my list of  "can't wait to support" movies: Middle of Nowhere directed/written by Ava DuVernay.



Basics: It's a tale about a woman who becomes a prison wife and has to hold it down while her husband serves eight years.

Reasons to show it some love: The lead actress, Emayatzy Corinealdi, is absolutely gorgeous and...

This guy, right here, Omari Hardwick plays the husband. 
Where I found the photo

Well, those are not the only reasons, but it helps. This film was written and directed by a woman of color, so you know that goes without saying; I'm obligated to see it, of course.

If this peaked your interest, you can find the list of black films premiering at the festival here.

In the meantime, I guess I will hop on the bandwagon and see what the Red Tails extravaganza is all about.
But not until Monday, when the theater's practically empty and I won't look weird going alone. Plus, I can chomp on chicken nachos as loud as I please, thank you very much.

Warning: Hole-In-The-Wall Music Included

During one of the many phone conversations I have with my sister where we talk about celebrities and reality stars as if they are our next door neighbors and we really know them, the whole Vanessa and Kobe Bryant dissolution of marriage situation came up. I'm not sure if you are aware, but Vanessa got what Eddie Murphy feared Omm-Foo-Foo would take from him, HALF!  Since Kobe couldn't seem to keep his Snicker bar in its wrapper, she was awarded $75 million of the his and hers $150 million he earned for his former lovely family.

Since I'm a person who believes every situation should have some theme music. This song seemed to fit it perfectly. I'm not trying to offend anyone, but uh....
(If you're the uber-feminist type, then this may not be your thing)

This is dedicated to Kobe. Go 'head Minnie May (Vanessa). 

On another note, I also want to acknowledge the late Etta James with one of my favorites.

Don't Talk About It... Walk About It.

(You ever met someone who starts working out for a few days and all of sudden they think they are the "be-all and end-all" of fitness? Well, let me introduce myself.  I started my "attack of the back fat" on Saturday and just think I'm too fancy, huh?)

I have thought about committing myself to working out and releasing my inner Beyonce' for a while now.  Every now and then I would go really hard (if you call Zumba really hard) and keep it up for a few weeks to a month. One Reese's Peanut Butter Cup and I'm back to asking myself, "what's wrong with being a little thick in the waist but pretty in the face?"  I finally figured out why I can't maintain the gumption it takes to keep my butt moving; I was trying to do every type of exercise and expect to wake up the next day being able to to wear a thoia thoing bikini.

I wanted to be Jillian Michaels, Billy Blanks and Flo Jo all in one.  Guess what? That ish don't work. You have to find the one program that works for you and stick with it. For myself, that would be anything that doesn't require me to lay down, bend over, jump, lunge, squat....etc. So that leaves me with the one thing I know I can do, walk.

While googling "How to lose weight by walking and still be able to eat Popeye's chicken," I found this nice little article on Frugivoremag.com that just confirmed what I knew all along; walking is the bomb, dawg. It doesn't require anything but some good shoes and a music device of choice filled with Lil' Wayne, Lil' Boosie and Lil' Jon to keep you moving. (ok, pick your own songs if you must).

Get your 30 minutes in, and trust me, you will feel a helluva lot better than if you chose not to.

Listen to Ms. Ce Ce Peniston. She'll tell you what to do.

If Food and Shelter Weren't Required...These Would Be Mine.

I'm not a fashion blogger nor fashion plate by any means. Hell, half the time I can't remember what I wore two days earlier, but I love to browse online for pretty pocketbooks. So here are a few that I've been cyber-stalking lately.

From Roger Vivier  Spring/Summer 2012. Viv'r Clutch.  This is so "Fight the Power" and "Do the Right Thing" to me, although I'm sure that wasn't their intention. Price unavailable.

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Hi pretty girl. (yes, I'm talking to the purse.) From Tod's Spring 2012 collection. According to Purseblog.com, it's made of sueded alligator and will run you a little over $30,000.

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Valentino Spring 2012 studded tote. Couldn't find price for this one (or just got tired of looking). I feel like a complimentary Harley-Davidson should accompany this purse. (no?)

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Burberry Medium Bowling Bag. This is more doable at about $1500.

Burberry Site

Well, until that marriage proposal from Diddy comes into play, I guess I'll keep dreaming and drooling over bags I will probably never own. What would you give up the necessities of life for?

Being Fit Not Your Thing? Not A Good Look.

Disclaimer: After reading and hearing about Paula "The Queen of Cheese and Butter" Deen's Diabetes Type 2 diagnosis, I think it's time that most of us realize you can't eat deep fried, buttered down, dipped in frosting, drowned in brown gravy type foods all of our life. This is one of those wake-up call posts.

I am declaring this week the official start of my war on fat.  This would be my fiftyleventh time, but I plan to get 'er done. No excuses. If you are tired of justifying your size to people who really don't give a damn what your excuses are, won't you decide to do the same?  If you are tired of taking 10-15 minutes to find a parking spot because you "don't want to walk too far," get off your behind and start moving.

Maybe you find yourself talking about what you are going to eat for dinner and you are still eating lunch. Well, it's time to change your behavior.  If you find yourself wandering around the kitchen in the middle of the night like a zombie looking for cookies, you need to get it together? (oh, that's just me?)  If you think they are making bar stools smaller and smaller these days, it's not true, your arse is getting bigger. (I'm the only one on that one too, oh.)

So, step back from the buffet, delete all of those fast food deal emails you signed up for and decide to add some extra years to the end of your life.

**getting off of my high horse now***

Pariah

It's been around for a minute, but I really feel like I need to help spread the word about this movie. I figured if I'm just discovering it, then there's a bunch of other folks out there in the dark.  Now, I'm not giving it a shout out because it's a film written and directed by a black woman and starring a black woman, but because it appears the acting is Oscar worthy.  Bump that, NAACP, BET Honors and (insert other Black awards show here) worthy.  I plan to check this film out as soon as possible.  If you are able to check your judgement and/or superiority complex at the door, then please do the same.

Check out the trailer.  Adepero Oduye plays the lead character, who also received a mention from Meryl Streep at the Golden Globes, and Kim Wayans flips the script on us.

Click here for more information and to find a movie house near you.

The Whole "Finding Love Online" Situation

If you've read my earlier posts, then you realize that I'm searching (yes, I said searching) for the man of my dreams, M.O.M.D. Although, it's only been a few weeks since I've declared 2012 the year of the M.O.M.D, it's not looking too good. So, I'm contemplating whether I should tread the murky waters of online dating again.

The thing about online dating is that it is fun and a good time when you start, then about a week into it you start to feel like you're browsing the "Wal-mart of love." (well, maybe that's just me) You start seeing the same profiles over and over of guys you wouldn't even consider talking to in person , then you start to get nervous because you haven't connected with anyone yet and look at those same pictures thinking, "well, he may not be so bad after all."  Trust me, if your first instinct was to pass that person over, do just that.  The good Lord gave you a conscience for a reason.

I really am pro-online dating for any "single" (and I stress SINGLE) person; however, I am really nervous about trying it for the third time. Could it be because at my very first meet-and-greet a few years back, the guy had to show me his "house arrest" device because he couldn't stay out after a certain time?  No, I still kept trying after that.  Maybe it was the over 35-year old man who told me that his mama said it was okay if I wanted to come by and watch movies, because she was going to stay in her room all night.  Nope, I still held on to a little hope.  Oh wait, the nervousness may be due to the guy who was obsessed with Usher and actually knew how many tattoos he had.  Dude couldn't pull his eyes away from the screen when an Usher video came on.  I have another one. Hold on to your lacefronts. What about a guy, career military fella mind you, who decides to send me a picture of himself on the toilet with the subject line stating, "King of the Throne?" (An image I'm still trying to delete from my memory bank.)

So, you can understand why I'm a little hesitant, but I keep hearing all of these positive stories about people meeting their husbands and wives online so the interest is still there. (Plus there's this ball coming up and I need a date.)

Well, I will keep you posted if I decide to hit the web again, but for now I'll just meet my "crazy" in person.

Happy Hour Fridays... let's get it then!

Another week has gone by and I'm still in the learning stages of this blogging deal. What do I do for inspiration?  Put on some good, "get up off your ass and dance" music.

Now this particular set of songs may require a nice glass of your brown liquor of choice. If you're not a drinker, then fix yourself some cherry Kool-aid and pretend you are, but for me.. I see Crown Royal Black in my future.

Here we go.  Let's go revisit some "real" live performances.

Maze featuring Frankie Beverly - Live in New Orleans. How would you like to wake up to this album on an early Saturday morning? Just ask my sister and I. My dad played this..and LOUDLY.

Teddy P. Watch how he never rushes back to the mike? Cool as a fan on a winter's day.

Whodini. Yes, I had to throw some old school rap in the mix. You know you want to get up, go ahead.

Luther Vandross.. nuff said.

 and last but not least because I have to stop somewhere...

Fugees - MTV Awards. If you've ever wondered why Lauryn Hill "is" such a big deal, pull this up on YouTube every now and again.

It's the weekend baby!

Ready for Spring already.

I'm so over the cold weather already.  Can we speed things up and fast forward to spring already?

Ready for Spring already. by durtysouthmama featuring a violet dress

Dorothy Perkins violet dress, $57
Pink Butterfly Tapestry Kit, £57
Jessica Simpson platform pumps, $90
Crystal jewelry, €53
MISSONI Sac, €605




The song that inspired this look. 

 You Make Love Like Springtime (propsEdit) by p-r-o-p-s 

Who Do I Write To to Make Sure Mrs. Harris-Perry Remains on My T.V Screen?

I have to admit that as much as I love to read, I rarely read long, drawn out articles regarding race or politics and it's on a very rare occasion that I read non-fiction. I read just enough for me to grasp the point of the article, then move on. The major news stations: CNN, MSNBC and FOX (when I just want to get my nerves worked up into a tizzy) are a major part of my remote control rotation as well; but once I catch the major headlines, I'm moving on to HGTV, Food Network or one of the Housewives.  This was until I discovered Mrs. Melissa Harris-Perry. I now feel like I have to step my political, cultural and "all around awareness" game up.

My interest in her started when she received a brief mention in either Essence or Ebony; from which I can't recall since I read both of them the minute I take them out of my mailbox. I discovered she was a professor at Tulane University located in my hometown and thought to myself, "Okay, I need to remember her name."

Well, it's a little hard for me not to remember her name since she is all over the place these days. She penned the book Sister Citizen Shame, Stereotypes, and Black Women in America (which is next on my book to-do list) and wrote an extensive article for Ebony Magazine about the challenges President Obama faces in the 2012 election.  She also served as a guest host on the Rachel Maddow show on MSNBC , (rocking long "kinky" twists by the way).  I guess she impressed the bigwigs so much, she landed her own show on the network which will begin airing in February. She did  those things and more all while maintaining her day gig.

So, if you don't know who this lady is, please visit her site or just Google her name and browse through the plethora of articles that appear.

Here's her most recent visit on Comedy Central's "The Colbert Report."

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Melissa Harris-Perry
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor & Satire Blog Video Archive

Imagine That

 Ms Ho by Onra

You are in a smoky, dark drinking spot seated at the bar with the second glass of Crown Royal on ice in front of you, lost in your own thoughts. Just as you are getting ready to light your last Black-n-Mild, somebody selects this song on the jukebox. You inhale, let out a slight laugh as you exhale and say to no one in particular, "Yeah, the bitch got what he deserved."

 (and scene)

Enjoy.

I Would Love to Travel, But...

Every year I pledge to gather up my lil homies, pack a couple of duffle bags and go on "real" family vacation. Not a long, boring road trip where they sleep the entire way and my only company is the radio.  I mean a trip where we get out of our comfort zone and experience what the world has to offer.  Year after year has passed by and I have yet to make the pledge a reality.

I know we can go on the typical family vacation like hitting up one of the Disney spots, Niagara Falls or the Grand Canyon, but I want my crew to think beyond the U.S.  As a single mother with two growing boys, I didn't think a vacation overseas would be doable.  I watch House Hunters International and the Travel Channel, and I just couldn't see how someone like me would be able to become a foreign traveler. However, after three weeks of blog lurking and stalking I found that many of us are expanding our horizons and getting out of dodge. I also have to admit though, the thought of traveling overseas alone with with two children is a little scary as well, but I'm sure my frazzled nerves will calm down after a little research.

So, I put together a list of places I would love for us to visit while they still think it's cool to hang out with me.     (Actually, times running short with the 15 year old, but he will have to deal with it.)

#1 London, England - This was the first place that flew out of Baby Bubba's mouth (my 10 year old).  "They have the Ben 10 ride there," he tells me. Well, alrighty then. The whole "unpredictable weather" thing is a little turn off for me, but I'm the one who suggested seeing the world so I will have to suck it up.  According to about.com, July and August are peak tourist season, so we shall see.

#2 Paris, France - The place I imagined I would travel to with my M.O.M.D; however in the meantime the kids will have to do. If you check out this jazzy site Disney put together, they actually provide itineraries according to age.

#3 Madrid, Spain - I'm just being selfish again because this another dream destination, but it seems the kids may get more out of this destination than I do. There are two theme parks in Madrid: Parque Warner Madrid and Parque de Atracciones Theme Park in Madrid. I figure you dangle those two hot spots over their heads they wouldn't mind checking out a couple of Picasso's with you.

#4. Amsterdam, The Netherlands - (Isn't that picture just sexy?) Yea, I know, the red light district and the "coffee shops" where you can purchase a little herb are the hot spots.  I figure since there are resident children, then there must be some family friendly action there as well. Check out iamsterdam.com. They mention a dungeon. We may have to check this out first.

#5. Costa Rica - A good friend of mine posted a video of himself zip-lining through the rain forest. My first thought was, "I have to go to there." Come on now, son. How could the children "not" want to do that? Click here for the official travel site.

#6. Italy - They produce guys like this over there. Need I say more. Oh, the children! I found this cool site, Ciao Bambino. It's a family friendly trip planning site with reviews and destination planning.

and last on this list, but we won't stop there if the Lord says the same (did I get that right?):

# 7. Australia - One word. NEMO. Well, that's not a reason to go, but wouldn't it be cool to spend Summer (our Winter) down under? I see a Christmas/New Year's vacation sometime in the future. Got this little info here.

I know being a single parent can be hard on the pockets; but if we want something bad enough, we will do what we have to do to get it. Cut back on some of those bottles of Moscato. Only hit the club during happy hour. Do you really need that many pair of stilettos or expensive sunglasses? Really? A buzz from some good tasting wine last a few hours, whereas a trip to another country will give your children something to talk about for the rest of their lives. I'm just saying.

Free your mind, and the rest will follow.  - EnVogue.




photo credits: http://flic.kr/p/9pXvSt , http://flic.kr/p/8P9D6K, http://flic.kr/p/8EoC6B, http://flic.kr/p/67NF7L , http://flic.kr/p/8YZY3G, http://flic.kr/p/4sBtFg, http://flic.kr/p/5Jhhfe

Children Eating Vegetables. Epic Fail.

Ok, so here's the deal. I have been in the parenting game for 15 years and some change and my children do not eat vegetables.  I don't care if it's covered with cheese, put on a pizza, hidden in sauces or what not. They will not touch them.  Whose fault is it? Mine.  I am that type of mommy who buys the fun stuff in the grocery store,  Bagel Bites, Chips Ahoy, corn dogs, frozen pizza, etc.  It's not because they like them, it's because I do.  I praise Mary's Little Baby everyday for school lunches, because I find comfort knowing they have revamped the entire menu to make it healthy.  At least somebody's thinking of my children's nutrition.

Now I have to say I may have done one thing right in the fruit department because they will devour apples, oranges, bananas and grapes.  But if I even attempt to put a green, leafy item in front of them, shows over. Oh wait, I'll take that back, my oldest ate a Ceasar's Salad his group made in food science class.

The reason this is becoming such a dilemma now is due to one of my many recent trips to the Wal-Mart.  As I was standing in the frozen food aisle trying to decide between shoestring fries and seasoned fries, this lady and her two "fancy children" walked up to the frozen vegetable freezer behind me.  I then heard her 5 maybe 6 year old son yell, "Mommy, don't forget my brussels sprouts!"  Really kid?  Then her teenage daughter chimes in, "Oh yea mom, make sure to get the edamame. mmm."  What the...?  Then "World's Greatest Mother" throws 2 or 3 packages of each in their cart and they move on.

As I watch this crew through the reflection on the glass (all the while rolling my eyes and making childish faces) I thought to myself, what did I do wrong?  My 15 and 10 year old children, who never make trips to the grocery store with me by the way because they are too attached to the X-Box, yell out things like: "don't forget the Dr. Pepper or honey buns" as I leave the crib.  It's a miracle my two boys don't resemble the Klumps with the amount of junk we consume.

So, I have decided to make a New Year's Resolution after all.  I will make my boys eat vegetables. This will be particularly challenging with  my 10 year old since his diet has consisted of chicken nuggets, Totino's pizza and hamburgers for the past few months, but I'm determined to make this happen or he will be quite the slim one by  the summer.  Not to say I will starve my child, but I'm not sure how long one can sustain on peanut butter and jelly sandwiches alone.

All Recipes.com, here I come with my game face on.


photo source: http://flic.kr/p/NbEHs 

When Beauty was Effortless

Here's a look at vintage, effortless beauty.

Take away the lace fronts, sew-in's, pinched noses, botox, MAC makeup, you name it.. do you think the starlets of today could hold a candle to these ladies?

Before Photoshop, and all the enhancements mentioned above, this is natural beauty at it's finest. Ladies who made it work with what God gave them.

source

Ms. Lena Horne. (This photo inspired the entire post.) Most of us remember her as Glinda the Good Witch in The Wiz or when she appeared on Sanford and Son to visit "little lame Lamont."

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Lola Falana. Another of Fred G. Sanford's "crushes."

Dianne Carroll. Known for great theater work, but I loved her as Julia and even more as Whitley's mama on A Different World.  The flower scene with Patti LaBelle, hilarious.

source

Sister Sledge.  Song played at every family reunion, class reunion...

Beyonce'. No, just kidding. Vonetta McGee from "Blacula" and "Shaft Goes To Africa".

source

Teresa Graves.  Get Christy Love. "She's One Bad Mamma Jamma," that's what the movie poster said.

Where I found it.

The Three Degrees. Long before Destiny's Child. Also, made an appearance on Sanford and Son.



And there you have it. My little tribute to beauties from back in the day. Now, let me go get my Forrest Gump run on so I can pull off one of those little halter top numbers.



Disclaimer: ShakyBliss does not claim ownership of any of the photos used in this post. The copyrights are held by their respective owners.

Happy Hour Friday... Yea, Buddy!

It's Friday; and since my brain is pretty much fried from attempting to stomp with the big dogs in the blogging world, the only thing I could think to do was share a couple of songs that helped me make it through the week. So, grab a cup of coffee, glass of Moscato or some bomb Diet Dr. Pepper and chill.

These are not new releases or anything, but they are "the business" nonetheless. Selections should be played in no particular order. Here we go.

Ayo - "Life Is Real"

 This should be the blogger's theme song. 

Tanya Stephens - "Can't Breathe" 

This is the joint you want to play after that "fool" you were spending time with decides he needs to move on. 

(disclaimer: I'm not going through anything like that at the present, just like the rawness of this song)

And for the last song for the day, R. Kelly's "Just Can't Get Enough."

This is the cut you want to play when you find that guy who gives you butterflies. Now I know Mr. Kelly has issues, but just forget all that and enjoy the song. If you are not rocking in your seat or swinging with somebody (or yourself ) where ever you are, then check your pulse. 

I'll stop there because I can go at this all day. D. J. Shaky signing off. 

Just Write and They Will Come?

As a music lover, I always need background music. So feel free to hit play on today's selection.

I have been blogging for exactly 13 days, and it is wearing me out.

I constantly ask myself: What should I write about? Are the page colors too cheesy?  How will I increase my traffic?  Was the last post incredibly stupid?  Am I supposed to have a theme or just go freestyle with this thing?  I then "blog stalk" and compare my few posts (and writing skills) to everyone else's hundreds.

So after work yesterday, I went to one of the two places that help me relieve stress.  The library. (The other is the bookstore. Big nerd, right?)  I read every title in the New Release section when it occurred to me that I was missing the whole point in blogging, I should write about whatever the hell I want to.

If I want to write about not going on a date in months, I will.  If I want to write about the last book I read, the last movie or t.v show I watched or my favorite songs, goddamn it, I will.  If I want to post pictures of random stuff I see everyday, who's going to stop me? I may want to discuss how my two sons leave their clothes in the middle of the floor, place empty juice bottles back into the fridge and eat like we are facing the apocalypse. (and don't get me started on the whole "pee not quite making it into the toilet bowl issue.")

With that being said, this blog has no real theme. It will be a hodgepodge, "organized mess" if you will, of all things that I feel everyone should know about.

So, now that I've "freed" myself of this ridiculous stress.(You see, this is where the song fits in) Let's get it then.

There May Be Hope In The "Triple D" After All?



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I'm not sure about this one, but while doing my daily blog lurking I found an article titled "Atlanta ranked best city to find a date in 2012" posted on thegrio.com. I did a double take complete with eye-roll because word on the street is the mighty ATL is not the most "single-black-female-who-would-like-to-date-a-straight-brotha" friendly city. I then wondered, what qualified as a "date?" ** insert side-eye**

You can find the original article on TheDailyBeast.com which lists the 25 cities us single folk are most likely to find a good date night. Well, looky-looky, guess what city made its way on to the list ranking number 19? Dallas "D-F-dub" Texas. Now I understand that the good people at The Daily Beast did their research and based their information on a bunch of stats that some of us could really give a rat's ass about, but I beg to differ.

As a single, black and yes, admit-tingly sometimes fed-up, black female who has considered Dallas my permanent home for the last six years, I can't see this with a high-powered flashlight on a sunny day. Date nights are so rare among the ladies in my crew; that when one of us get asked out, we are dancing around like we are in the "Can You Feel a Brand New Day?" scene in the Wiz. It seems most of the guys in this city  have more "divatude" then we do, so we have to ask them out. I know that's supposed to be part of the whole "go after what you want" mentality, but I'm not feeling it.

As a result of this disappointment, many ladies are either burying themselves deep into The Word hoping the Lord will send their M.O.M.D (Man of My Dreams) to their door step, considering mixing some vanilla with their chocolate or searching for love in other cities via dating websites, looking up old high school/college boyfriends on Facebook, prison pen pals, etc. (just kidding)

So, can somebody please help me and tell me where I can find one of these dates?

M.O.M.D Search 2012 still in effect.

Tippin' on 4 - 4's

Alright, so here it is. The Biggest Loser (Funky Cold Medina Style) at my job has begun. Since I'm the initiator and ring leader of this group, I need to step up my game. The thing about it is, I gained 4 pounds during my weight loss hiatus. It's all good though, because I don't feel bad about it and I still feel "cute."


I surveyed my kitchen yesterday and realized my good friends snuck their way back in. Little Debbie, Oreo and Totino's, which were supposed to be for the children (ahem), but some kind of way my laptop has a magnetic force field that these snacks gravitate towards and find their way into my mouth. I need to get that checked out.

My entire workout routine has been demolished, destroyed and fallen down the black hole. I am totally starting from scratch. So wish me luck good people and I hope to make 2012 the year of "stone, cold, turning heads - foxiness."

Back to work after the holidays!!

+, a photo by JanssemCardoso on Flickr.

I don't have alot of time to blog right now but I had to express how I felt about returning to work after a three day weekend. I think this beautiful young lady's face says it all.

52 books in 52 weeks.

Loads a books!, a photo by mwiththeat on Flickr.

Ok, since I'm struggling to come up with interesting posts and still somewhere in the abyss in regards to the direction of this blog, I've decided to read and review one book per week to get the creative flow moving.

First book, which I'm re-reading, Upstate by Kalisha Buckhanon.

Mr. Bill Collector...My mama said, "She's not here."

Musical accompaniment is required for this post. Hit play above.

(I'm about to keep it real, because that's all I know how to be.)

Well, here we are in the beginning of a new year but with the same old bills. I consider January the recovery month, because I usually robbed Peter to pay Paul during the holidays and will need to ask Peter for an extension when all the festivities are over.

Like many single moms, I make this pledge in the beginning of the year to get my finances in order. Most of us usually find ourselves with more month at the end of the money and can't figure out how we got to that point. Well, (and I can only speak for myself) I know why, no budget. A budget is like a wealthy man, I never had one.  I've had very good intentions in the past, and may start off real strong for about a week or two, but too many trips to Pizza Hut, XBox Live points for the boys and picking up things "I've always meant to try" at Wal-Mart kill it. I then spend the rest of the month giving my caller i.d the side-eye whenever the phone rings.

I'm pretty sure a really good budget can save myself from a ton of stress and keep me from pondering the thought of applying for a "waitress" position at the local dancing girls spot. (Not like you haven't thought about it) 

So, let's make 2012 the year we really get our "ish" together. When you find yourself "hood rich" (a term my sister uses to describe a lump sum you may receive like an income tax refund check), pay off a bill, get your paycheck out of lay-a-way (pay day loans are the devil), don't hit the mall or purchase that iPad right away (which is a hard one) and put some away (my biggest challenge).

Please share your tips for keeping your head above water while in the struggle. I need them.

What I will or won't do in 2012.

I managed to bring the new year in with a bang. Now that I've fully recovered,  it's time to think about what I will or will not change.

1. I will stop considering my bed and Joel Olsteen's or T. D Jakes' broadcasts my church home. (Get off my hind part and find a church to show Mary's Little Baby some love.)

2. Keep the negative energy at bay. Remove I can't from my vocabulary bank.

3. Learn how to keep plants alive. My crib looks like a plant hospice.

4. Stop allowing myself to be hoodwinked and bamboozled by my children when it comes to school projects.  There's a fine line between assistance and "just let me do it."

5. Read and review a new book every week.

6. Stop obsessing over finding the M.O.M.D. (I just want to be able to walk down the aisle without the aid of a walker, that's all.)

7. Stop destroying meals because blogging/blog stalking is my current addiction. (The black-eye peas are still good. Just don't scrape the bottom of the pot.)

8. Plan two trips this year. One for me and my lil homies (sons) and one for me and my crew.

9. Stop telling myself that size 12/14 is the new size 6/8. Either do something about it or recognize my "thick girl swag."

That's pretty much it.  Anything beyond this list would be a bunch of tomfoolery.

Happy New Year!